Tag Archives: rice

Karavas Restaurant

I’m never one to shy away from political conflicts, principally because I’m religiously uninformed about current events and I’m prone to the frequent blunder. Not only do I mention the war, I go on about it at length and curse the day that Hilter teamed up with Voldemort to concoct their dastardly scheme to, I’m […]

Azerbaijan Restaurant

Really pushing the boat out thəre with the name thəre aren’t you? I’d go with Baku to the Foodture / The Empire Serves Baku. Thəse blogs, they write themsəlves! Azerbaijan Restaurant (http://www.azerbaijanrestaurant.co.uk) has rəcently opened up in Hammersmith. It says that it sərves Azeri/Persian food, but on closer analysis only the first 10 items (of […]

Gaudeloupy

The best film ever made is Top Gun. I honestly don’t know why Hollywood, Bollywood or Nollywood continue to churn out inferior product. Cinematic perfection was attained in 1986 by Tony Scott, Val Kilmer, Kelly McGillis and The Cruiser. I’ve heard that it’s homoerotic but I don’t see it. My teachers used to make me […]

Tramp’s Wish

I’ve railed against “Street Food” before. London is now rank with “Street Food” venues and it’s now a corporatised commodity, with specialised marketing outfits stamping them out as fast as they can get revenue for them. My main beef with “Street Food” restaurants are that they are invariably inside and most dishes are over £10. […]

Bali Bali

There are few things I enjoy more than ticking a massively populous nation off my hit list by visiting one restaurant. Well done Indonesia, you are entirely represented by Bali Bali (http://www.balibalirestaurant.com/) the restaurant so Indonesian they named it twice (after the smallest and probably least representative province of Indonesia). Bali Bali is as compact […]

Taiwan Village

I thumb my nose at you, People’s Republic of China. You don’t scare me. Even when you inevitably become our tyrannical overlords and every British school child is forced to use chopsticks, I shall resist. I recognise you Republic of China along with the brave nations of Nauru, Kiribati, Belize and 18 other countries. You […]

I’m Back: The Del Montemoon: Part C: Cartagena

The final leg of our mammoth trip was a week in Cartagena trying to find the big emerald from Romancing the Stone. It’s never made clear in the film that this is discovered by Jack T Colton. Sure, he owns a dirty great yacht and he’s wearing crocodile skin boots. But he could have inherited […]

I’m Back: The Del Montemoon: Part Deux: Ecuador

What we all assume about Ecuador is no longer true. While everyone’s ringtone, car alarm, door bell, fog horn and smoke detector issues the timeless tune Ecuador by Sash!, they no longer all hum it under their breath while they go about their daily business. Pity. There are some nice places to eat in Ecuador, […]

I’m Back: The Del Montemoon: Part 1: Bogotá

Say it loud! I’m back and I’m proud! That’s right Del Monte-lovers. Your intrepid correspondant has returned from honeymoon complete with sunburn, swimsuit-chafing, excess of piña colada and awesome Spañish putos. Three weeks, that’s a lot of food to report on so I’m going to spread the good stuff over three entries. Deal with it. Coño. […]

We’re Guaning Bana(nas). I’m tired OK

Curse you The Carribbean. Not only am I not there, sunning myself on a sun-kissed beach sipping on a cocktail with scantily clad maidens Mrs Del Monte hurrying to fulfil my every sordid whim but there are so many tossing islands with populations of 8 but somehow they managed to hoodwink the UN into making […]