Category Scotland


[Cripes alorky! Everyone look busy. In a first for this blog, Mrs Del Monte is putting pen to paper. Mind your Ps and Qs, tuck your shirt in, tie your laces, drag a comb through your hair, push the outie belly button in. Chin up, chest out. If she asks, I blog every day, dutifully, […]


There’s been a lot of debate about whether Scotland is a real country or not. The jury’s out and no amount of devolving is going to clear this matter up. In my experience, the last thing Scottish people need more of is devolving. Don’t worry, I know this sounds insulting, but those Scottish that can […]

Immature Cheddar

[I’ve been to Cheddar Gorge. I mean, I’ve contracted Cheddar Gorge, but a course of penicillin, (accompanied by a stern admonishment from my doctor), cleared it up. Honestly Dr Hammerstein, I was simply walking my dog on Clapham Common. Rex. That’s his name. The dog’s name I mean.] When you read The Figmentation of Timothy […]