Tiroler Hut

I have bulging vertebrae. We were all thinking it. Anyhow, it means that for the time being sitting is very painful and going for supper in a restaurant with me is now as uncomfortable for me as it has always been for everyone else having to watch me feed. Stupid karma. And now I’ve stubbed my toe. Seriously. Screw you karma. And now I’ve bit my tongue.

Luckily that bitch karma (papercut) was nowhere to be seen when me and Monty went to Tiroler Hut (http://www.tirolerhut.co.uk/) for supper. Discreetly tucked away from street level, the interior is a true Tyrolean snug, gingham clad tables, waiters, who also wore lederhosen, and waitresses who didn’t wear low cut tops, which, to be fair, is a complaint I have about virtually every restaurant. Apart from those heros at Hooters. The service is fast and efficient. And I enjoyed a tall, cool Hirter beer whilst perusing the satisfyingly brief menu.

Monty and I shared Champignons Tiroler Hut, cheerfully laced with garlic which made even the walnuts contained therein tolerable. This was followed by Wiener Schnitzel of course, which was reliably tasty and had a lifespan of approx 8 seconds. £60 for two which was expensive but well worth it for the atmos, service, food and singalong.

I’ve been to Vienna which was awesome and clean and cold. Monty made the unusual decision to insist on visiting Starbucks for calorific, coffee-flavoured ersatz milk rather than any number of the coffee houses for which Vienna is famous. I also spent a week in St Anton but thought I was in Switzerland so I don’t count it.

ÖSTERREICH!

Mushrooms mit bacon und walnuts. Or Bacon with mushrooms and walnuts. Or walnuts with bacon and mushrooms.

Mushrooms mit bacon und walnuts. Or Bacon with mushrooms and walnuts. Or walnuts with bacon and mushrooms.

Wiener Schnitzel. If there's anything tastier than veal then I'll feed it milk and restrict its movement to make it tastier.

Wiener Schnitzel. If there’s anything tastier than veal then I’ll feed it milk and restrict its movement to make it tastier.

Hirter? I barely touched her! I'm joking. I didn't touch her. I didn't even look at her. I don't even know who her is. Yay feminism. And the ladees.

Hirter? I barely touched her! I’m joking. I didn’t touch her. I didn’t even look at her. I don’t even know who her is. Yay feminism. And the ladees.

From outside it's just a doorway. Inevitably it is downstairs. At cellar level.

From outside it’s just a doorway. Inevitably it is downstairs. At cellar level.

Much more room for manoeuvre than your standard Austrian cellar.

Much more room for manoeuvre than your standard Austrian cellar.

DAß MENU! Good luck reading that.

DAß MENU! Good luck reading that.

the big board austria

The Tiroler Hut
27 Westbourne Grove
London W2
Tel: 020 7727 3981
http://www.tirolerhut.co.uk/

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