Pico Bar & Grill

Nestled among the gay bars, gay saunas and a pretty gay bathroom supplies store, under the arches of the railway at Vauxhall, is the Pico Bar & Grill. On the way to the Lambeth Country Show (http://www.lambeth.gov.uk/Country-Show/), Senhora and I stopped in for a quick bite to eat.

Like the restaurants we enjoyed in Lisbon it’s good honest grub, rapidly served and well prepared. I think the sardines and lamb cutlets could have been better seasoned, but while sprinkling salt on them both was exhausting and time-consuming, once I’d accomplished this Sisyphean task, the results were well worth it. Forget you, lazy chefs. Forget you.

The best thing was the Flamed Chouriço in Wine, though I think considering the location they could call it Flaming Chouriço in Wine. An explosion of taste that made me resent having to swallow when there was so much more juicy flavour to suck out of the turgid, spicy sausage that the handsome waiter had given me to nosh on. I’ll be honest. Had I known how that sentence was going to turn out I might have reconsidered starting it. But it’s out there now. There’s simply no taking it back.

£40 for two people including a £17 bottle of Vinho Verde, which I think is far too much for Vinho Verde. I know these guys have to make their money, but that seems like a preposterous mark-up.

I’ve eaten very well at the Estrela Bar on the South Lambeth Road. Vauxhall/Stockwell is known as Little Portugal because of 5 portuguese restaurants all approximately in the same place. I know there’s a bunch of Korean restaurants in Malden; and of course there’s China Town. I’m wondering if there’s a Little Liechtenstein, because that would really help my quest out. Other than the actual Little Liechtenstein I mean.

PORTUGAL!

CODA

Went to Lambeth Country Show to laugh at sheeps, be baffled by reggae music and to sweat with 100,000 other English people under the sun. I also snacked on a Trinbago Roti, filled with goat curry. It was delicious and super spicy, the chunks of goat were incredibly tender. But, because a certain portion of mancake has an issue with me counting pop-ups as part of the quest, I shan’t be counting the Trinbago Roti Hut. That’s no problem. There’s probably loads of Trinidad and Tobagan restaurants in London. Hundreds I dare say. I just need to wander into Little Trinidad and Tobago when I’m next there. Easy. Forget you mancake. Forget you.

PICO BAR & GRILL

Flamed Chouriço in Wine.

Flamed Chouriço in Wine. Hot stuff wouldn’t you say?

Lamb cutlets cuddling.

Lamb cutlets cuddling.

Patatas Bravas. Brave little fellas. They didn't get chomped in vain.

Patatas Bravas. Brave little fellas. They didn’t get chomped in vain.

Squeezing lemon on a sardine with the level of concentration most people reserve for administering first aid to a loved one.

Squeezing lemon on a sardine with the level of concentration most people reserve for administering first aid to a loved one.

The menu. Can you read that? Didn't think so.

The menu. Can you read that? Didn’t think so.

Compounding the futility of the above picture, here's the other page of the menu.

Compounding the futility of the above picture, here’s the other page of the menu.

The bar bit.

The bar bit.

The cavernous interior of Pico Bar and Grill.

The cavernous interior of Pico Bar and Grill.

TRINBAGO ROTI HUT

Trinbago Roti Hut.

Trinbago Roti Hut. A hut can’t be a pop-up can it? Forget you pal.

If there's a way to eat a goat roti un-angrily then I don't know about it and I don't want to.

If there’s a way to eat a goat roti un-angrily then I don’t know about it and I don’t want to.

Pico Bar & Grill
74 Albert Embankment
London
SE1 7TL
Tel: 020 7820 1282

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